I have a new name!

Andreas has begun to call me, Ema-mother. I am so excited! He has spent 11 years in an orphanage without a mother, yet he still understands what a mother is. I am feeling so blessed. It is encouraging to think that I am doing well enough for him to recognize a mommy when he sees one.:)Not that I feel like I am doing a great job. It feels alot like those first few weeks with my firstborn. I definitely did not feel like I was doing a good job, and I was scared to death. This time, I'm not so scared, but I am not confident either.

Day 2

It is killing me not to be able to post pictures! I'm working on it!

We are not likely to get done early because of the holiday. All offices are closed now until Monday. New Year's is HUGE here. People are very excited. I've run into quite a few drunk people in Old Town, too. I'm so glad we are staying in a quiet, family neighborhood this time!

I went shopping this afternoon. Last year I found a woman selling knitted items in an alley off a side street. It took me forever, but I finally found her. Her prices are much lower than the main square, and the quality is good. I bought mittens for Meredith and Connor. :) I still have to find something for the others. It is nice to get out and walk so much. I can't believe how well my back is handling the walking. It is very level in our neighborhood which helps.

Little Man could cause my back some problems, though. He is heavy and quite a handful when he decides he doesn't want to cooperate. So far, those times have been few and understandable. We had to hold him while he got 4 shots, poor guy. He didn't want his fingerprints taken either, but we managed.:) His behavior overall is excellent! He is a terrible tease, though. If we react to something, he will do it over and over with a huge grin. He is so funny and has a great imagination. He also loves to help, and will do almost anything to hear me say, "aitah", which means thank you.

He misses his home, poor little man. Yesterday, he asked to go several times. He kept asking for his caregivers by name. It is hard to see him sad, but I am happy to know he is so attached. He loves to cuddle up on the couch with us. I have even gotten a few kisses.

Here are a few random facts for the Crawford kids at home.
1. Dogs are everywhere. We didn't see them before because we were not in a neighborhood.
2. Babies are pushed in carriages, but toddlers and preschoolers are pulled on sleds.:) It is so cute! Way easier than a carriage in all this snow.
3. Everyone under 30 smokes. Yuck! You smell it everywhere.
4. Even the coolest guys wear hats and mittens or gloves and WARM coats.
5. We can watch tv in English-American or British, French, German, Russian, or Estonian.
6. Most of the day is twilight, especially if it is cloudy. It is weird because it feels like evening all day!
7. Business offices are more high-tech than in the US.
8. People here must love herring. There is an entire refigerator case full of smoked herring, pickled herring, herring in cream sauce, herring-spam-eggs-and-herring.:) You get the idea?
9. We ate blood sausage. It tasted okay, but I still get queasy if I think about it too much. I don't think I will ever do it again.
10. WE MISS YOU SO, SO, SO, SO MUCH!!!!!!

First Day

Our first day and night with Andreas went well. Dan and I are still struggling to adjust to the time change. Both of us are a bit foggy and sleepy most of the time. It doesn't help that it is only full daylight for a few hours around noon. Dan had a very tough day, yesterday. He is way too hard on himself. Everything went well with Andreas who LOVES his Daddy. Dan just has a hard time communicating with people here. He is too animated and expressive for this culture. He will be so glad to return to familiar, smiling faces!

Andreas' bed is in the living room,which is where the internet connection is located. That makes posting tough, because when he goes to bed, we lose the computer. I will try to post while he is napping. We are hoping to find another cable that fits the camera so that we can upload some pictures and video.

I hope no one thinks we aren't missing the kids at home!! We have to be here, so we are trying to make the most of it, but we would rather be home. Now that Little Man is with us, we won't be doing too many touristy things. One thing we know for sure, we WON'T be going to McDonalds. We tried to go in to use the bathroom, and Andreas refused to walk through the door.:) Can't say I blame him. Dan and I take turns getting out on our own to shop and explore a bit. It is very beautiful here. It doesn't seem as cold as home because there is less wind.

Crawford kids- I miss you so much I can't stand it!!!! I am happy that you will be going to Grammy's today and then on to the Hartleys. You will have fun celebrating New Years. Everyone here seems to celebrating already-with firecrackers! I hate those things!!! Poor Andreas was covering his ears and running away, calling "help me"! I couldn't tell if he was seriously scared, or just playing because he was laughing like crazy. He looked scared, though. He also calls out "help me" when we wrestle or tickle him. It is so funny. He calls to which ever of us isn't playing at the time. "Mami, help me". Dan loves to make him do it.:)That is something I have to get on video.

We Have a New Son.

Just after 12:00pm, Estonian time, Andreas Reimann Crawford became our 5th child. I can't wait to post pictures. We were very surprised to see him at the courthouse. The judge wanted to meet him before meeting with us. He remembered us and gave us hugs. It was such a delight to see him again. He is just as little and cute as I remembered. We had a fun, but busy afternoon with him. Tonight he is staying one last night in his orphanage. Tomorrow, our new life begins. Thanks for all the love, prayers and support.

We Are Here

Tallinn got lots of snow over Christmas. There is way more than when we were here last winter. It is very pretty with the snow and the Christmas lights. We also have a gorgeous apartment with a park just across the street. I took lots of pictures to show you. When I went to upload them, however, I discovered that the wrong cable had been packed. It doesn't fit this camera. Ugh! No pictures for now. Sorry.

We have court tomorrow at 11:00. That means by the time you are all up, we will have a new son.

We Are In Frankfurt

We made our connection in Chicago. Now we should arrive on schedule. I don't know if we have internet access in our apartment, but I will post as soon as possible.

Crawford kids-We miss you already!!!
Garrett- I'm so glad we can depend on you! Thanks.
Meredith- Hang in there, Sweetie. You will be just fine.
Connor- Thanks for being so comforting to your sister.
Gavin- Miss you like crazy! Be good and have fun.

Thanks everyone for all your help.

Now I'm Excited!

Pretty much everything is done. We are finalizing arrangements and the shopping is done! Some of the presents are wrapped, even. We have had some last minute scrambling, but it all seems to have worked out. The charger came today, Shea!! Now, just pray for Saturday's weather. It is supposed to be icy.

You Must be So Excited!

I am very glad that everyone is excited and happy and overjoyed for us because I honestly have not felt any of those things. When we first got the call I was stunned, shocked, unable to comprehend that it was real. That was followed by a deep sense of relief and gratitude to our Ever Faithful Lord. After that came sorrow and shame that I had ever doubted Him.

Since then, I have spent 3 days sick, then busy preparing for the trip and Christmas and racing to swim meets and concerts and dance recitals. I have been overwhelmed, stressed, and busy-way too busy to feel much of anything positive. BUT....I am convinced that since this is God's timing, it is the right time. I am convinced that when I am weak, He is strong. I am trying to remember to pray. It feels like I am holding a lifeline. Grace, strength, wisdom, peace. Those are my constant requests. I am NOT unhappy or miserable. I am okay.

While I was packing Little Man's new belongings, it struck me that he, like all of my children, will come to me naked and empty-handed. None of my children arrived without a great deal of pain and hard work. This labor will be very different, but no less difficult. I remember rejoicing at those first signs of labor and the early pains. I think I congratulated God on His choice of timing. A little later, when those early pains began to grow stronger, though, I changed my tune. "Maybe tomorrow would be better, Lord. You could just stop things for a while, and I'll rest a bit more, and then I'll be ready." It didn't take long to realize that resting wasn't an option, so I gave up fighting and gave myself over to the process. I so want to do that with this process. I am afraid because so much is unknown. I know it is going to hurt, and I wonder how I am going to handle it. I know it will be hard, and I don't want to lose control. People will be watching, and I want to look good. Somehow, admitting these things makes them seem less important and smaller.

I have to get back to work. There is still MUCH to be done! Please keep our family in prayer. I don't want to lose Christmas in all this rush and bustle.

What a Day!!

Today has been a wonderful day!! This morning, Dan and I visited Little Man's future school and future classroom. We saw several people we know, and ran into a few others we didn't know worked there. Then we met two teachers and visited both their classrooms. We loved both teachers, but one classroom was definitely more appropriate than the other. The whole school seemed to be aware that he will be coming. They were all excited and all knew his name. The teacher asked for a picture to help the other kids get ready for his arrival. The other kids were fun to watch. There are several boys his age. It was so encouraging.

Later in the morning, we headed out to my friend Nancy's old farmhouse in Hebron for our homeschool co-op Christmas party. The kids had a great time sliding in the back yard. They live on a huge hill! Everyone brought gifts for the newest Crawford boy. We got 2 big bags of used clothing as well. All of the new clothes are in the pictures above. Most people didn't sign their gifts, so I don't know who to thank for what!!

The pictures are in reverse order. The last picture shows all the gifts before we unwrapped them. He is going to be a warm and cozy boy. He even got 2 pairs of pajamas that are totally boy! Hurray! No more purple princesses.:) We are so grateful! This was such a HUGE help!!

Please enlarge the quilt pictures so that you can see the details. A very special and thoughtful friend made this quilt for us. We just met this fall, which makes the gift even more special. The love and thought that were put into this hand-made quilt is overwhelming! In the center is a heart. If you look carefully, you will see that the heart is overlapping the squares. Two of the squares are red, white and blue patriotic prints. The other two are the colors of Little Man's country. She had to look that up because it isn't common knowledge. The pattern of the quilt is called "Log Cabin". That was chosen because it represents "home". She really put some thought into this, huh? Then, each square is made of one color. She was thinking that as we tuck him in at night, or cuddle him in this special quilt, we can also help him learn his colors in English.:) I don't even know how to say thank you for such a special gift.

When I got home, I found an envelope from Reece's Rainbow with our grant money enclosed. A couple families gave us money to help outfit Little Man. I wanted a picture of everything we were given, so I will never forget! I am exhausted from thinking about everyone's generosity. Again, I am so thankful!!

Dan came in just after I got home. His office had celebrated our good news at their Christmas party as well. His co-workers all pitched in and gave us gift certificates to help with expenses. Wow! Blessing upon blessing!!

Finally, the first picture is from last week. I had just finished the mittens and wanted to pull together the whole winter outfit. Connor was making hot chocolate at the time. The package said, "Just add water"! When I looked at this picture all I could think was "Just add Boy".:)

School Arrangements Under Construction

Last Friday, I contacted our neighborhood school principal who in turn contacted the system special ed. director. She called me a few minutes ago. I am so impressed! The first thing she did on hearing about Little Man, was to look up his country so that she could learn about his heritage. She was disappointed to learn that he is not home with us yet because she wanted to come meet him today.:) She wants us to tour the school this week, and has started the paperwork for our first IEP. She offered many options for school placement. If we find we want to keep him home, they will provide therapies for us. If we opt for school, he can go full day, part-time, or even come home for lunch. The kids in the classroom he will most likely be in, have swimming lessons every week, and the program seems to be connected with Special Olympics. I'm so excited for all the new experiences Little Man has in store. Of course, we won't rush him into anything. I am just happy to know there are so many opportunities for him. He has missed out for far too long.

We Have An Apartment

The place we stayed before is run by a woman named Jelena. J offered to help us find an apartment because EVERYTHING is booked for New Years. There are celebrations for Christmas, Orthodox Christmas(Jan.), Winter Solstice, and New Years. Next to mid-summer, this is the busiest time of year, so we were lucky to find a place!! Unfortunately, prices are way up because of the high season. J was able to find us a place close to the area we are familiar with. We are so thankful!!!We haven't seen what it looks like, but we don't really care as long as it is warm.She also offered to pick us up from the airport and bring us to the apartment. She is wonderful!! I think I will have to give her a special gift, too.

We are hoping to get a Christmas tree today! Of course, we will never be able to keep Shlya away from it. We also will have to take it down Christmas night....but we PROMISED a real tree this year.

Flights Booked

Golden Rule gave us an amazing deal. Dan and I are leaving from Portland on December 26th at 10:46am. We will be arriving at our destination about 25 hours later. It will be around 5:30pm their time on December 27th. Please pray that all goes as planned with no storms or other delays, since we have court on the 28th.

I was disappointed to learn that the apartments where we stayed before are all booked. Almost everyone who goes there to adopt, stays at those apartments. It sounds like it might be hard to find a place. I guess everyone likes to visit over the holidays. Suggestions anyone?

Much was accomplished yesterday. I contacted insurance companies, school administrators, and doctors' offices. I was able to begin on arrangements for the kids. A couple of people, in addition to our parents have offered to help. I'm going to check in with our church to see if someone would be willing to plow our driveway if it snows while we we're away. We have already had alot of snow, so it is very likely we will get more!

Last night was our office Christmas party. I had a great time. It was a perfectly timed break from the busy-ness of planning. This morning, I am really feeling excited. The shock and panic have worn off a bit. Only 16 days to go!!!! I keep wondering what expression I will see on Little Man's face when he sees us again. I am so hoping it is a happy one!

We Have a Court Date!!!

Monday, December 28, 2009. Only 18 days away!!!!! We are leaving in 16 days. Tonight, I am NOT panicking. I am going to knit, and make lists of everything I will start panicking about tomorrow!

We truly could have gotten Little Man for Christmas. We were offered December 23 as well. Somehow, I just could not wrap my brain around leaving before Christmas at this late date. Some people might think we are horrible to wait, but we will have lots of celebration time with him when we get there a few days later.

For the last month, I have been praying for the 28th. The kids will be on vacation the first week we are gone which will make childcare arrangements much easier! Easier is NOT the right word... less insane is more like it. Wow, wow, and WOW!!!!!!!!

A Little Disappointed-A Lot Relieved

I talked to Diana from AHI today. She called to check on our court date. They don't have one yet. They told her probably January. At this point, I wasn't really expecting a date in December, and had settled myself to wait some more. Earlier this morning, I talked to Barbara who said they were still trying for December. That threw me into full-fledged panic! I couldn't even eat. I have so much to do! What about Christmas? How will I get everything ready? I finally gave up trying to do anything, and took a long, hot shower. When I came out, I got Diana's message. Whew! What a relief.

Unfortunately, I still feel jittery and anxious. My heart is racing like I had too much espresso. The kids helped me bake some Estonian gingerbread cookies. My house smells amazing!! The piparkoogid are delicious, too.

I feel a little guilty about not being too disappointed. Now we can enjoy Christmas. It will be a nice distraction, I think. One thing I can almost say for certain is that a very special little blonde cutie will be celebrating Christmas 2010 with his family!

I still don't know the date, but I believe the countdown is down to a few weeks. Soon we will be counting down the days. Jallenagemiseni!-See you soon!